Ate It Up | 07

Good books, writing, exciting news, and always shoes

Where the work happens. With my cutie lamp from Seren <3

Happy Black History Month. Grateful to be here, to be Black, and to celebrate our brilliance every day. This past month felt like it was 60 days. But the new year is here and starting with a damn slap in the face. My friend asked me if things were crazier than usual. Or what the hell is going on? I looked at her like “Girl, I’m looking for someone to tell me”. Every day feels like a marathon. And I want to tap out. But we are here, and kicking it into February. Sending love to folks around the world impacted by any of the many terrible things. Recently, lives were lost in the airplanes that hit Washington DC, and Philly. Rest in Power.

I journaled and meditated a lot this month, trying to calm myself down. To avoid waking up in a panic, plenty of time for that when the Summer hits. Texas had a pretty mild winter, but still, I struggled with seasonal depression. Accepted that it was inevitable and went outside every day regardless. Before moving I was never able to do, it in Ohio’s freezing temperatures. There, I was in the house as much as I could be from November to March. Morning walks have made such a difference in my routine. An opportunity to feel small, helps things feel so much less daunting. Why stress before the sun has even shown up? Other fun news, I got my desk and it has completely changed my perception of working from home. Fred and I were sharing a desk before which worked for a while but the new setup feels like the refresh I needed for this new year. Sitting there in the quiet of the mornings, heaven. This month I revisited some old favorites, found some new goodies, and as always had a lot on my mind. Hello, to some new friends also, not sure how you found me but I am glad to have you here. <3

Heads up this post is too long for email. Sorry, not sorry. ;)

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Shows

Scandal(Hulu)

This is a rewatch for me. And yet again it has me in a chokehold. Shonda! How do you do it, queen?! This show follows Olivia, a lawyer, powerhouse, and boss as she helps people in power navigate messy personal lives and dilemmas. The show scratches my brain and I’ve wanted to rewatch, it because I can’t remember how it ends. I’m not sure I finished it. TV shows are one of my favorite things to recirculate, watching this show at 15 compared to now. In a way, it’s like watching a whole new show. But I love the mess, seeing Olivia’s silk press bounce as she steps on these b***** necks. Nothing like it. Also Fitz…hubba hubba…I ain’t no better than Olivia.

The Upshaws(Netflix)

Mike Eps is honestly a gem. This show has become such a random comfort watch. It follows Bennie and Regina as their family has messy but resolvable dilemmas. It is fun and heartwarming. Makes me miss coming home from school and catching the sitcoms while I did my homework. It is rare to see a Black sitcom on TV and even rarer for it to pose realistic situations and still be humorous. This show does it all.

Love Is Blind: Germany

A MESS. The Love is Blind franchise is diabolical. I watch every season. They recently came out with a slew of seasons outside of the US, UK, Sweden, Japan, Mexico, Argentina, Germany, and Habibi. I randomly decided to check this one out. It is a mess. But I expected nothing less. I’m on episode 5 and I have no faith in anyone making it to the altar. I’m also like why is everybody lying, or always seeming confused on the show? Then it comes out when they meet each other in person and they look disappointed. Sometimes I’m literally like cut the cameras out of discomfort but I guess that’s what the show is about?

The Ultimatum(Netflix)

A HOT ASS MESS. No words.

Queer Eye(Netflix)

I like the addition of Jeremiah to the interior design portion. I like his style and he knows how to not make all these houses look the same. Sorry, Bobby. This season is cute and I am impressed it is still able to maintain its charm. I don’t find myself gravitating to it as much. But seeing everyone in a new season thriving brings me joy. I love to see how much they get along with each other and the people they help. The show is still really something special.

Twin Peaks(rewatch)(PlutoTV)

RIP David Lynch. I loved his freaky, quirky, and much-needed sense of cool and chaos. The first time I watched this show it took me so aback. I felt like an immediate fan. I had never seen anything like it. and have yet to still. The show follows Dale Cooper as he visits Twin Peaks following the death of a young girl. Everything is upside down as secrets come to light as the mystery behind the murder uncovers. It is sexy, dark, eery, and witty. And if you haven’t watched it, I highly recommend it. Pluto TV on Roku has both seasons for free in honor of David’s passing. This show is truly one of a kind and there is nothing that will ever compare. <3

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Movies

Babygirl(In Theaters)

Nobody puts a baby in the corner unless she wants it. Y’all. This movie was something else haha. It follows Romy, a hardworking CEO who is longing for excitement outside of her daily life. She starts an affair with an intern working at her company. I have never watched a movie like this in the theatre, which I do think impacted my experience. I will never forget how many people laughed at scenes, where the humor was up for question. I kept thinking “Is this supposed to be funny?” but no one had an answer for me. I found the plot a little hard to believe. Maybe it’s cause Antonio Banderas fine-ass played a dreamy-ass, sweet, sexy, loving husband. I feel like if they had a conversation he could've easily given her what she wanted in the bedroom. But maybe that’s part of her frustration. Valid. I did watch it with two of my friends and it was honestly so fun, and I loved to talk about it after.

Paddington and Paddington 2

People call these the best movies they have ever seen. Alright! They are cute though. Paddington is a bear from Peru that ends up in London after tragedy strikes. The movie follows him and his new family which helps him on his new journey. It was so endearing and I did tear up quite a bit hahah. I’m so proud of him. I found myself laughing out loud, giggling, and loving the characters. It’s been a minute since a movie checked so many boxes. Weirdly made me wish I had kids so we could watch it together.

Sonic the Hedgehog 3

I love my husband y’all. If he ever doubts it he should be able to pinpoint at least 3 times, watching all three sonics, where my love truly showed up. This movie follows Sonic the Hedgehog from the game…IFYKYK. It’s so goofy and kinda good. Jim Carrey makes this series kinda iconic. In this one, he plays two different roles, which is much needed. He is so outlandish and It seems so many bits are improv which makes me cackle so much more. Sonic was played in my household religiously so seeing it get a new life breathed into it, is a little refreshing.

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Books I Read In: January

This was a slow but impactful reading month for me. I’m in the mood to read multiple books at once. So next month will be jam-packed. As always I have a GoodReads where I post reviews, also on my Instagram where I call it Book Notes.

Not a Monolith by Shantasha Naomi Laing

My oldest and dearest friend got me this book of poetry for my birthday. Thank you, Mike and Ike. It was my first read of the new year and my first book of poetry in a few years. Shantasha talks about Black women, in context and with a relevance that is much needed. I found the book to be impactful, and brief but quite fulfilling.

The Fire Next Time by James Baldwin

I’m a big believer that things meant for you won’t pass you by. Reading this at a time like now, proved this. My spirit needed this. My heart needed it. And I believe it found me at the time I needed it most. Baldwin’s writing is piercing.

“It is not too much to say that whoever wishes to become a truly moral human being (and let us not ask whether or not this is possible; I think we must believe that it is possible) must first divorce himself from all the prohibitions, crimes, and hypocrisies of the Christian church. If the concept of God has any validity or any use, it can only be to make us larger, freer, and more loving. If God cannot do this, then it is time we got rid of Him”.

The way he writes about culture and religion is unlike anything I have encountered. As someone who grew up in the church, his perspective feels homogenous to that of my own. Offering me growth past my view at the same time. I am new to Baldwin's nonfiction books, but already in love. A review will be coming soon, but for now, know it is exceptional.

Currently Reading/Recent Pickups

An American Marriage by Tayari Jones

Mentioned this in my last roundup but this book follows married couple Celestial and Roy. It follows them as they endure wrongful imprisonment and the struggles of love endured. So far, I am adoring it. I’m taking my time with it. There is a portion of the book, where they exchange letters, which has such an impactful effect on the world these characters live in. How they move and observe, feels so vibrant. I can’t remember the last book I read where I felt like I understood the characters so well.

Intermezzo by Sally Rooney

GIRL. Sally is writing but reading this has felt like such a struggle. I’m sadly just not in the mood. But the characters so far are so sweet and tender, so nothing against them. It’s one of those things that I have to keep reading to see how I feel. Check in next month. I am gonna push through because I am reading it alongside two of my friends and I want us to talk about it. I’m trying y’all but also pray for me. I’m on page 120, is there hope for me?

Everything I Know About Love by Dolly Alderton (little free library)

I have heard such great things about this and it seems right up my alley. It is a memoir of the author as she navigates her 20s. Seems playful and more of a summertime read. Excited to read it hopefully near a body of water and the sun on my face.

Crying in H Mart by Michelle Zauner(from Stella <3)

I’m sure everyone knows about this book. This is a memoir by Michelle who is also the lead singer of Japanese Breakfast. I started the audiobook of it but knew I needed to read it physically. Stella gave it to me on her way to NYC, love you Stel <3.

Little Eyes by Samanta Schweblin(from Stella <3)

The other day someone mentioned this book and the next day Stella asked if I wanted it. Don’t know much about it but I am excited to find out.

Chromophobia by David Batchelor

I started reading this book in my elective class. It studies and dissects color and how it pertains to the Western world, and its perceptions. I found the dissection of color prevalent, for my research, hence the quote.

“There is a kind of white that is more than white, and this was that kind of white. There is a kind of white that repels everything that is inferior to it, and that is almost everything. This was that kind of white. There is a kind of white that is not created by bleach but that itself is bleach. This was that kind of white. This white was aggressively white. It did its work on everything around it, and nothing escaped”.

WOOF. Right?

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On My Mind This Month: Notes

• I think we are all in love / hate how much we consume the internet. Maybe that’s an assumption but I think it’s general. The whole stunt pulled with TikTok reminded me of this feeling. The give and relentless take. I loathe how much I think about it and let it consume me. But all the while it feels inescapable.

• Chani meditation app

  • I used to occasionally use Co-star but recently discovered Chani Nicholas from the Vibe Check podcast. I found her background so interesting and she is so knowledgeable about astrology. I love the app and its many features and find it so much more accurate and informative than a lot of others. I now pay for it if that means anything because I enjoy it so much.

• Dewy mornings

• Reading past my bedtime

• Chocolate chips

• Comfortable shoes

• Love

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Food/Recipes:

Gluten-Free Chicken and Dumplings

I followed this recipe but just switched out the regular flour for GF. I used to love to make this when it was cold and soup season. And it still hits.

Zeds Real Fruit Ice Cream

My favorite combo has banana ice cream with chocolate drizzle, I’m salivating thinking about it.

Peanut butter chocolate chip cookies from my boo Stella <3

These from this recipe are the perfect chewy-to-crunchy ratio <3

Lots of shoutouts in this Monthly rundown to Stella, lolol. She made me some of these cookies, a few times, cute. They are delicious and I just remade them since I had all of the ingredients. I miss my bae. :/ They are simple and yummy. Peanut butter, chocolate, elite combo.

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Music:

This has been a podcast month for me.

Granta Magazine

I love writing and listening to people talk about writing and their writing processes. Say it loud for the folks in the back! Granta is a literary magazine and publisher in the UK. I found their podcast through one of my favorite writers, Brandon Taylor, whose ep I loved. But now it is been fun to just learn about people that I’ve never come across. I think there’s so much commentary that the literary world offers especially in this political climate. READ. READ. READ.

Stupid Genius PHD Podcast

Girl, I am such a student. I am accepting it about myself, although it can feel unnerving at times. Recently I came across this podcast on IG and started giving it a listen as I was doing my Ph.D apps. It brought me so much comfort. Both these women share valuable notes and experiences about their time getting their Ph.D.s. It’s interesting to hear about these programs outside of America. They are based in the UK. Ph.D’s are weirdly vague to me, so hearing folk’s experiences has been encouraging and helpful. Lots of love to the Doctors.

We Don’t Always Agree with Ryan & Sterling

I love these two. Back in my This is Us days I learned about Sterling(Randall in the show) and his wife Ryan. The energy these two have together is what I love to see. I find them very real honest, and hilarious. I love the way they banter, hear each other, and share their experiences. I admire anybody in Hollywood, that can keep and honor themselves and their sanity. Shout out to them. Love to see Black folks, blessed and doing their best not to stress.

Don’t Change A Thing/ StyleLikeU

StyleLikeU has impacted me over the years. It’s taught me to care less, listen more, and accept uncomfortably. They now have a podcast format compared to just the YouTube videos and I have loved tuning into the mother-daughter duo. They are one of the few podcasts that make me feel consciously reflective. I find them both to be honest with themselves which in turn you feel as part of their audience. I like myself more because of this podcast. It makes me feel, love. How magical.

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Random but good things: wishlist/pickups

This month was full of things!

Readin’ Magazine

I am contributing to a magazine. It is called Readin’ Mag. The first issue just came out, check it out and subscribe if you haven’t. The magazine is created by two creators with a love for reading, and the folks who contribute are highly varied. I loved this first issue and am so excited to be a part of this new effort. Getting contacted about this made me cackle, I put it on my goals for the year to submit to a magazine. So I appreciate that I am more equipped to do that. Is life sometimes, actually about getting what you asked for?

Passport!

I finally got my passport! Well not yet, it’s in the mail. This has been a long time coming and something I have wanted since I was little. Dreaming of taking trips to numerous destinations just because I can. Also, I think my photo turned out pretty cutie. :) I know I’m gonna cry when I get it in my hands. Stay tuned.

Le Bon Shoppe Socks

I bought my friend a pair of these and had to buy myself some cause they have been on my list for some time! I picked up the Boyfriend sock for myself and the Girlfriend one for her. The colorway and feel of them are so good. It’s annoying. So, perfect socks do exist.

Brahmin Wallet

I bought a new wallet and I love her. She makes me feel grown and sexy.

Acoustic Guitar

A random one but I used to play guitar and I loved it. I’ve been thinking about picking a new one up. Fun fact, the first song I learned was Skinny Love by Bon Iver. But I loved playing pop and folk tunes and learning cord changes. The one I want is a Rogue RA-090 in sunburst. <3 Might have to pick it up soon cause my hankering is vicious.

SHOES! SHOES! SHOES!

Every day I think about shoes. I blame growing up watching Sex and the City. Now, Carrie’s behavior is normal to me. I have a vision of wearing more comfortable but cute shoes. So, shoes are always on my wishlist.

Sabah

My friend showed me these and I love their style. They look funky yet cool and like a bit of me! They are a pricey penny so this is more for wishful thinking lol. But one day!

I love their colorways and they all look so comfy.

Clarks

Wallabees used to be such a hot girl shoe. Were they? IDK but they feel like they are now. I love the way people style them and the colorways they come in. Clarks makes so many different styles also, cute ones. The Blue Crocs ones feel like an absolute must. Few things make me feel as good as a quality shoe.

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That is it for now! February is always a reminder to appreciate my mother, my family, and my loved ones. To honor each other for how far we’ve come and to continue to see the light ahead. Love to my Black people. You are my reason for being. Without us, this country would not exist, and life would be desolate. We are the heartbeat.

I am looking for some new music to listen to, full albums, no skips, preferably. Been into an indie vibe lately. Angie McMahon and Dijon specifically. But open to anything, just now tuning into Bad Bunny’s new album and I need to twerk somewhere. <3. Thank you for reading, it is always such a joy to do these monthly writeups and it means so much that you read them.

Lots of love, always

Ya, Little Mama!